And in This Week's Installment of "What Can't Google Do..."

...it's time to cross "offer live traffic updates on cell phones" off the list.

Other random links that I've amassed recently:

• Could this article about a Tomahawk missile on a New York highway have a more groan-inducing headline?
  
• Courtesy of YouTube, here is Dave Chappelle's controversial "Racial Pixies" skit. Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
• More from YouTube: Two pieces of videographic evidence that history will likely judge George W. Bush to be a bad president.
• Still more from YouTube: Yoda breakdancing. (Imagine if the time and brainpower spent putting such things together were instead dedicated to finding a cure for cancer or figuring out why Lauriol Plaza is still popular?)
• Here's a funny article about the absurdity of the Department of Homeland Security designating 77,000 different sites across the United States as "critical infrastructure." And here's the not-so-funny part: the government probably could have afforded to secure all of them (deserving or not) if it weren't for the war in Iraq.